If All Else Fails, I Can Be A Moving Body For N.E.R.D.! May 14, 2008

I’ve been happily unemployed for a few months, but all good things must come to an end…

This morning after I exhausted myself by submitting four online job applications (let’s hope the actual jobs are less work than the application process because damn, I’m pooped — I feel like I need a vacation on top of the vacation I’m already on!), I decided to unwind by checking out N.E.R.D.’s performance of “Everyone Nose” from Monday’s Late Show With David Letterman.

I liked this song when it first leaked a couple of months ago, but I’m “over it” now. I’m only posting this because I need a job. Like, really really need a job. And when I was watching N.E.R.D. perform, I couldn’t help but notice those moving bodies creating an eyesore on stage with them. What are those guys (surely they’re not so bold as to refer to themselves as “dancers”) and how can I be one of them?

This is the exact type of job I’ve been looking for my entire life! One that requires little to no skill, one that will make me feel like a rock star — a job where all that’s required of me is to just show up.

If one of those moving bodies should fall victim to an unfortunate accident and lose the ability to move, I can start immediately.

EDIT: Hey, looky here: the new music video featuring America’s favorite coke addict, Lindsay Lohan.  Don’t blink or you might miss her.